Tag: Health

Myself, Random

No Longer Alone: A Blog Post

Sanjay Sabarwal
Love Problems and Advice Illustrated SA
Image via Wikipedia

Sitting in the quietness of the day, I now know that I am not alone anymore.  Prior days, weeks, months that were spent alone are now shared with someone I love deeply.  It’s an intense feeling, shimmering over my thoughts briefly, sprinkling my days with a deep longing for the one gone temporarily. I no longer have an emptiness in my soul or the need to fill myself with temporary distractions just so I feel as if I am alive.  Looking around my friends, I see some who are alone, who are going through the same struggle as I did when no one could fill the void in their soul.  Sure, we all have false starts and even perhaps some slight promise of one or two who may be the one, but deep in our hearts we already know that is not true.  As someone with several failed relationships, I am well aware that more times than not, we breathe life and personalities into people just because on the surface they seem so right with us.  In a way, we try to force upon ourselves and the person, who they SHOULD be rather who they ARE.

Yet, I also know the hard truth that this battle is theirs alone, and the only thing we can do is to love them as our own and be there when they ask for us.  You cannot force yourself upon anyone, no matter how great your intentions.  That’s a hard lesson for me, as my instinct is to always jump in to help.  But just like with success, a friendship or a relationship  can only move forward when we accept who we are and stop trying to change the one we want them to.

Of course, nothing I am saying is new or even perhaps original, just that it’s funny how all of us at one time or another go through the same experience, but really just fail to realize that there is always someone who has gone through exactly the same thing.  My point?  Look around you, and you will always find the support, love and kindness you need.  You just have to believe that you are NOT alone…

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Brownness, Diet

Diet Day 3

Sanjay Sabarwal
An egg in an egg cup in the little-endian orie...
Image via Wikipedia

Based on Four Hour Body by Timothy Ferris

Starting weight: 214 (day 1: forgot to mention measurements, this will also keep me honest)

Waist:46

Hips:41

Arms (16 left, 16.5 right)

Thighs: 24, 24

Today’s Weight: 209!

Waist: 44

So I have decided to weigh myself in the mornings and I thought (still think) that the new scale is broken because it read 209.1 (how’s that even possible?).  I did drink over 2 liters of water which led me to go to the bathroom every 15 minutes (and I wonder why no one talks about how urgent urination becomes when you drink so much water).  I am constantly worried about pissing my pants (doh!) and whether I am eating enough protein. Since I have done Atkins before, I am not as bothered by the diet although to be safe, I am just eating Beans and chicken since my cholesterol is a bit high.

Todays meals

Breakfast: 4 whole organic hard boiled eggs with lentils (mixed in with chat masala, onions and tomato and lime juice, its awesome) around 40 minutes after waking up.

Lunch: got greedy and ordered 2 fajita salad bowls with double chicken, double black beans, double peppers, all the salsa and guacamole.  Only managed to eat one bowl from Chipotle

Second Lunch: 2nd bowl of Chipotle Fajita bowl

Dinner: Protein shake, 10 oz water, worth about 20 grams of protein.

I haven’t decided if I am going to post daily or weekly (probably a bit of both) as I am determined that once I hit the 20 pound loss group, then I hit the gym because my end goal is to be in the best shape of my life.

No wonder, I have been stuffed all day, and oh yea, a HUGE first for me, coffee with no sweetener (that’s probably the only thing I miss).  Bye, Bye Splenda and Agave, I think I can do without you.

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My Diet

Sanjay Sabarwal
The 4 Hour Work Week Book Cover Timothy Ferris
Image by Gauravonomics via Flickr

So I took some notes as several friends and family have requested what the diet consists.  I am following the Four Hour Body by Timothy Ferris, and the first step of the diet is by just doing this diet, you can lose 20 pounds in 28 days. The next step after that is to exercise if you want to lose more or exercise, diet and supplements to get a kick ass body in 6 months.

I am on Day 2 and so far it hasn’t been too old as the diet is pretty similar to the Atkins diet with one major exception (and why I love it), it has a cheat day where you can eat anything and everything you want and that actually makes you lose weight even faster.

So with that put aside, here are my rough notes, but I highly recommend you buy this book, it’s easy to read and in less than 100 pages can explain what you need to do to lose 20 pounds ASAP.

Four-Hour Body Diet

 

1)   Get Body Circumference to get Total Inches Before

a)    Four locations: Mid Bicep Both Arms

b)   Waist

c)    Hip

d)   Mid Thighs

2)   Avoid White Carbs: All Bread, rice, cereal, potatoes, pasta, tortillas, and fried food with breading.

3)   No Fruit, drinks 1.5 Liters of water a day. No dairy

4)   Eat Same meals over and over again

a)    Proteins: (need 20grams of protein per meal) ( 2-5 organic eggs, Chicken breast or thigh, Fish, Grass fed beef, pork

b)   Legumes: Daal, Black Beans, Pinto Beans, Red beans, Soy Beans

c)    Vegetables: Mixed vegetables (broccoli, Cauliflower or cruciferous vegetables), Sauerkraut, Kimchee, Asparagus, Peas, brocoli, Green Beans

5)   Ideal Schedule

a)    10 Am Breakfast: eat 30 to an hour after waking( Scrambled Eggology, black beans, mixed vegetables or a 30 gram protein shake with water and ice)

b)   2pm Lunch (Mexican restaurant/chipotle)

c)    630 Pm Smaller second lunch (Grass fed beef, pinto beans, mixed vegetables)

d)   8-9 Work out

e)    10pm Dinner (grass fed beef (trader joes), lentils and mixed vegetables

6)   Take one day off and go crazy.  No calorie counting!

7)   Supplements: Magnesium (take 500mg before sleep), and Calcium

8)   Spices: Garlic salt, montreal steak run, thick salsa with no sugar, white truffle sea salt, tarragon, Thai Chili Paste, Sricha, Balsamic vinega and oilive oil.

9)   Macadamia oil and Chee,

10)                  Chipotle (Fajita Bowl: peppers, onions, steak, tomato salsa, green salsa, cheese, sour cream, guacamole, romaine lettuce)

11)                  Grocery List

a)    Organic Eggs

b)   Black Bean Can

c)    Lentil Can (or you can get steamed lentils from Traders Joes, add lime juice, indian spices, tomatoes and onions and you can get like 60 grams of protein of one packet!)

d)   Mixed Vegetables (Broccoli/Cauliflower)

e)    Soybeans

f)     Kimchee

g)    Siracha hot Sauce

h)   Ghee (yes the indian one!. Timothy Ferris loves it

i)     Asparagus

j)     Sauerkraut

k)    Green Beans

l)     Red Beans

m)  Grassfed Beef

n)   Breast/Thigh Chicken

  • o)    Tuna in Water, Onions

p)   2 Liter Water Bottle

q)   Tape Measure

r)    Macadamia oil

s)    Lime Juice

t)     Magnesium

u)   Calcium

v)     broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, kale, cabbage, and bok choy have in common?

w)

 

 

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March 1

Sanjay Sabarwal
by Jemal Yarbrough

Tomorrow begins the stage for a lot of changes in my life.  With one journey finally put behind, I am now ready to take get on several untraveled roads before my 40th birthday.  I know most of us start New Years resolutions at the end of a year so why now?  My reply back is why not?  I had no idea what to expect in December and was completely in the dark.  In a way, the time spent caring for her and others, as well receiving and accepting help from others made me realize how much I missed being the one that always had a plan.

Somewhere, somehow, something ignited in me that I can no longer ignore.  Why 40? because it’s a pinnacle of sorts. It not now, then when?  If I don’t work on losing weight, writing, learning spanish and doing an event, then when?  I just accepted life as it came along, never realizing that life is what you make of it.  Sure, people will think I am crazy, some will just shake their heads because they have heard this before (notably my family), and others will laugh (probably many), but something is different, I have had my Harajuku moment (from the Four Hour Body by Timothy Ferris, www.fourhourbody.com ) and I know I want to be better, or maybe just myself again. I want to do all the things I envisioned doing earlier except just got side-tracked.

Don’t get my wrong, I wouldn’t change anything (not the stroke, not the cancer, not the divorce), nothing because each had something to teach and until I got the lesson, they would have continued repeating it.  So tomorrow isn’t just a new day, it’s a 9 month march towards achieving to the best of my abilities, come hell or high water.  I’ll be damned if I enter 40 flabby, unpublished and demoralized.

You are my witness.  Keep me honest.  I will also be blogging regular updates on my new focus.

Cancer, Myself, Preeti

Run This Town

Sanjay Sabarwal
Rocky IV
Image via Wikipedia

 

by Jemal Yarbrough

 

Cue “Run This Town” by Jay Z from his Hits Collection Vol 1, put it on repeat, flash to another waiting room, another place where nurses don’t look at you or can’t remember her name, surrounded by some smiling, others crying, some just blank and others just there.  Time ticks.  The music goes on and the heart expands, and in those 4 minutes, you look around the dreary room and say “we gonna run this town tonight.”  Flash to the car, hitting 100 miles an hour, feeling like 200, and you keep the song on repeat, nothing else will do, this song, this Anthem, gotta break the rules, I don’t care, I am gonna run this town tonight.  I pledge the allegiance to her, this is almost over, a small bump, blip in the radar of life, we got this baby.  Almost there.

Time becomes meaningless, only the music remains, the thoughts only her, willing her to hear your heart, almost there babu,  the finish line is coming up.  All your love, all your work, everything you got, give it to him now (quoting Rocky 4, Duke’s speech to Rocky in the last round versus Drago), and then another line hits me (He’s cut, you see, he’s a man, he’s not a machine.  He’s hurting. No pain, no pain!) and suddenly Cancer is our Drago, you ain’t so bad. We are coming to the final around soon, and your are cut, and guess what: we run this town.  No pain. All our love, all our happiness, all our dreams, all our hopes, desires, just around the corner.  We have just begun, we didn’t pick the fight but we are going to end it with a knockout.  The only way to live baby because we run this town.

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Living for Today: My New Blog Post

Sanjay Sabarwal

 

by Jemal Yarbrough

 

A beautiful morning, sun bathing the room so much so that I wonder if I have ever seen it like this before. Then it hits that the sun is lighting up what’s inside me, and I smile.  And I smile some more because the external radiation and chemo are done.  Gone is the not knowing, the fear, the constant ache of “will she be ok?”  Don’t get me wrong, I am not looking past the fact that she has internal coming up, but Cancer cannot make us ignorant or scared anymore.  The big bad wolf has turned out to be a mere shadow that we magnified in our mind.

I cannot help but soak in the sun, letting it breath into me more strength for her.  The burden has gotten lighter, we are beginning to see the end of this trial, and for once can actually discuss the future rather than future appointments, can actually look forward to the weekends as a real break rather just something to give her some breathing room, can plan to run a household rather than worry if the house is poisoning her somehow.

Still, I cannot get rid of some of my hurts, while looking forward to the new joys.  I miss some greatly while others with a tinge of regret wondering where it all went wrong, and others just not ready to be there for us, and that’s fine.  I love them all, but I am also cautious, I know now that some were unfairly put on high pedestals and some pushed off too swiftly.  So I sit here and learn while the sun continues to fuel me, make appreciate what I have and love, and I know of only one certainty and that is today.  What is it that I can do today that represents, us, and our family.  What is it that I can do in the next moments to just make it a little easier or fun for us.  So I sit here, smile and feed hungrily off the sun waiting for inspiration, oh wait, the better word would be knowledge or perhaps just accept that it was meant to be that my car came back the same day the major part of the treatment ended.

All that time worrying just really wasted because what was meant to happen, did, and what wasn’t just  resided in the endless loop of thoughts in my head.  So I breathe out slowly, the worries, the fears, the not knowing, and revel in the moment, just enjoying the day, the moment, the realization that we will get through this, that we already have, that what I needed was always there, I just didn’t want to see it that way.

However, (is there always one)  I know that there is much to be done, much for us to do, to travel, perhaps finally get on a plane together, but more than that for me to get back to work.  That’s really the strange part, I miss it, and finally know what I am meant do there.  I never thought I would say that, but looking at myself through my family’s eyes made me realize that I can be general counsel, and the fears and doubts (particularly the lact of confidence) were my own creations.  I was my own hurdle.  I had convinced myself that I would never learn but worse that I couldn’t learn, but the previous months of reading and writing made me realize how much I miss the law, and why I fell in love in the first place  I also know what kind of lawyer I cant stand, and there are many attorneys who exploit California law to just make money for themselves while claiming to be consumer attorneys.  I no longer will let my ignorance be the reason, my business suffers.  No more.  It’s time to discard the uniform of “I don’t know” and don on “I will get back to you on this.”

Funny, what a few months of cancer can do to you.  Instead of sapping us of our energy and will, it has renewed it. So thank you cancer, for making me realize what is truly important.  I owe you one but I wont ever like you, and one more thing: fuck you.  Sorry, but your just really not forgivable.  Besides, it’s you who gets my negative emotions or others, and I choose you.  You are my big bad wolf, my enemy, my bad versus good.  So deal with it.  I will be celebrating when you die, and I will dance on your grave.  You maybe “the emperor of all maladies” but you have no clothes.

 

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