Sanjay Sabarwal's Blog

On my birthday eve, it feels important to take stock of where I am currently. It helps that my birthday is the in the first month of the year, and also always allows me space to consider how the previous year went and how I want the present year to go. I tacked on dry January this month after experiencing a horrendous New Years Day hangover that had me in bed all day. That’s something I do NOT want my son to see or experience. My reasons for getting to that point irrelevant except that to notice my behavior and ensure it either doesn’t happen or there are far fewer occurrences.

While I managed to stick to my workouts and intermittent fasting, work growing extremely fast took me my surprise (and it shouldnt have.) It led to a change in my weekdays which contains less of Zyan. It has not been easy for either my wife or as he undergoes testing our boundaries (well more of hers since she has him way longer), and we see less of each other. So while it appears to be good news in a sense, I can happen feel a tinge of sadness each time I leave him.

Who knew that having a toddler at 53 could be so much fun? It still feels unreal, still fantasy, still like a moment that will disappear. Looking around my life now, I think back to my 33 year old who was clueless, still finding his way, still wondering what life had i store for him. A bit too heavy. unfocused, unsure, insecure and concerned on how to make a living. And poof, now there are different worries, and it hits me its this low level anxiety that keeps me pushing forward, staying curious, trying new things. doing hard things because I have people actually depending on me.

They not only support me in multiple wayrs, they make me want to be the best version of myself. Which means asking myself the hard questions, leaving things that don’t serve me, giving myself appropriate breaks, and also taking the time to not also feel gratitude but also look forward to 54.

Happy Tuesday all!

Today begins a hectic month for me at work, and all the other areas of my life. I already started the day missing my 5am workout because I wanted to ensure my son was okay and my wife supported as it was a long night. I rushed into this Monday anticipating a lot of things, but the life had its own things to add. From breakdowns to breakthroughs. From moving to a new office to thinking of new ways to handle stress and upcoming work.

From still learning on things to improve on to still discovering that clear communication takes time to build when we start with old assumptions and not truly present. Its a lesson that I continually face as work gets busier and more and more gets on my plate. It can be easy to lose track of my why for all the things I wish to do with my life. But thats a cop out, too. Just like showering daily, I get to work on this daily rather than saying I did it once (like resolutioins).

Thats not to say I have anything against resolutions because they are a great motivator, but I also know me that I tend to overly focused on the destination rather than the journey or the lessons to take from that challenge. Apparently, there are still a lot old lessons I get to relearn, and for once, apply to my life so that way I am not in the same position as before.

So today on this New Day. I endeavor do lean old lessons so I can build a foundation for a new me.

With 2025 just 2 days ago, it seemed fitting to take some time to reflect on 2024, and what is it that I wish to do going forward. I listened to an amazing podcast by Mel Robbins and how to make the Next Year the Best Year. It included 7 questions you need to ask, but before that she asked listeners to open up their phone and their camera app and look at the pictures from 2024. After than, she advised to look at your calendar.

While I thought I had not travelled anywhere, I managed to do a Cousins trip to Cabo along with a family trip to Vegas, Temecula. and San Diego. And then I opened up my calendar, and this year I had the highest amount of hearings I attended, held 4 legal seminars. did 2 trials, and got one a client one of my biggest settlements to date. None of this is to brag, but it is true that you can lose sight of all that you got done when you dont take a look back.

This year, I also began doing Crossfit at Crossfit Resolution as well as stretching through Pliability app at 5am, average 4 times a week which has been a game changer as I run after a rambunctious 2 year old at 52 years of age. What old dad? Nope, not here! I also managed to read a lot more that I planned and wrote 2 personal essays which is my lowest output to date, but it doesn’t matter because I still got it done even though I have no idea if anyone actually reads my stuff on substack.

So before you wonder the 7 questions (summarized by me) are:

1. What are the experiences that created positive feelings for you?
2. what are the experiences that created negative feelings for you?
3. What did you learn about yourself this past year?
4. What are you going to STOP doing this year?
5. What are you going to START doing this year?
6. What are you going to CONTINUE doing this year?
7. What can you do TODAY to take the first step to making 2025 your best year?

Well for me, the first step was reviewing the pictures and the calendar, and then also writing answers to all of these questions, and then calendaring my first month for my hearings, and important tasks before then as this year, it was a challenge as I felt like I was always just reacting.

So there you have it, so much occurred in between these words, but I also still see myself as. work in progress, and look forward to the joy that Zyan brings. Happy 2024!

Having recently started business coaching, my coach asked me how I handled my days. I proudly stated I use a time blockling planner daily to which she asked if I knew what I would be doing for the week already or did I just react to things. Which is exactly how it has been happening. I am blessed with a sudden influx of new clients in two very different practice areas: Employment Law and Family Law. The two could not be farther apart, but in a way they make perfect sense for someone like me who is a Supporter.

As much as I cringe saying this because I know how it sounds: I am easy to talk to, and generally my clients feel heard. As a former business owner, and having done a year of Pro Bono Family Law, I am uniquely situated to help those type of people. Which also means that I am continually getting calls that obliterate my. nicely planned out workdays as I react to my clients sudden needs.

And there are also the weekends which we are usually filled with family get togethers or meeting up friends, and while I am grateful, there are times it feels like 7 days in a row of activity where there is no time for rest, reflection, and planning. Which is why it hit me that I get to put it ALL on my schedule ahead of time, which means asking the questions, talking to my wife getting clear on our agendas, knowing my upcoming hearings, or things that I committed to on a whim while speaking to a client. It also means saying no or giving realistic timelines.

All stuff that I find incredibly difficult to do when I am just in my head, and assuming that those around me will somehow know by osmosis which does a great disservice to the people in my world. And now it makes more and more sense that I am not just getting business coaching, I am learning better ways to communicate, align things with my values, and being a better organizer for the tasks and people in my life.

Because at the end of the day, if I am not present for the things that matter, then what am I really doing? Happy Monday!

This past weekend came at the heels of a busy week with a new schedule and efforts by me to corral my growing legal clients and tasks with a business coach and an existing CRM that I purchased 6 months but failed to take advantage. It was also a week of five 5am crossfit workouts and doing something with Zyan each night, and it felt I got more done this past week than I had the previous month!

And then came the gatherings that established new relationships, hardened existing ones, and created gratitude for those that were in my life. 3 events in days, a BNI holiday party, a friendsgiving and then going to San Diego to visit my sister in law and her family. But the kind of weekend that rejuvenates rather than exhausts, where one fills themselves with warm conversation, deep hugs, and full throated laughter.

And 2024 is still not done. First week of December and my amazement grows at the progress and fruits of doing things that matter, being around people who only wish the best for you, and colleagues who go above and beyond in recommending your business to others. I cant wait for what 2025 has to offer because in this moment, right now, I am beyond thankful for thats in my life.

For me who tries to be in gratitude as often as possible, Thanksgiving is Manna from heaven as we get a chance to sound out whats in our hearts. The best part was that we were blessed to have 2 events, one with family and another with extended family. Watching my wife in awe as she transformed our place into a place full of thankfulness for our little one, and the ones who are in love with him. The entire day was spent watching Zyan fully enjoy all those are just cannot get enough of him (neither can I).

Looking back, the day went by way too fast, and I wish I could have slowed down more to take it in more, but here I am and this works too. I get to visualize the smiles, laughter, the sheer amount of food, and the general feel good buzziness (my word) of being around people you deeply care for. I do wish I was more of a help to my wife, but my creativity unfortunately ends at writing, but I do resolve to do better.

Its hard to believe that we are in the last month of December of 2024, and 2025 awaits us. Its no wonder we have such a great holiday near the end of the year to truly appreciate all that we have rather than what we don’t. Sure, there were lessons, and opportunities to be better, but on this one day we also got to truly revel in the greatness that is our life.

Happy Belated Thanksgiving all.